OVERLOAD!

Can I just say I am in wedding OVERLOAD?!?!?! I have been mercifully drawn to the computer designing a wedding I have not even set the date for. I have not put on a bra, brushed my teeth (or my hair). I let the children play in the rain and eat whatever they wanted since I rolled out of bed today. Planning dinner? Yeah, well, I told Steven to bring home a frozen lasagna.

I am a bit of an oddball when it comes to my taste in things. I have an eccentric imagination and tend to sway toward things that are far beyond my budget. Not because I necessarily like expensive, it just ends up being that.

I have been dreaming of my second wedding forever. Since before my first wedding. I always wanted to have a costume ball and a Halloween wedding. Even going so far as to requiring all of my invited guests to be in costume. Well, being that this is my second wedding and Steven's first, my dreams will remain dreams. Steven wants a traditional church wedding. Such a boring way to go, really. But, I guess I cannot expect much more from a southern Baptist-raised Momma's boy. And with that, I will allow his "church" wedding, sans zombies.

My taste in dresses has always been the same though. I LOVE Victorian/Burlesque style dresses. Corsets and bustles and lace, OH MY!I have decided the wedding will be very steampunk sexy. I love mustaches. They will have an avid part in the wedding design. Don't judge me.

I am so positive I can pull it off, except for my dress. I know it is going to be the most pricey element of the wedding. I am more worried about finding the dress. I have found a ton, but my figure does not fit in "normal" sizes. Ordering something online is out of the question. Unless I find someone who specializes in a Dolly Parton size.
I would love to find a super seamstress with tons of experience locally, to help create the buxom dress of my dreams.

Is it sad that I do not want any bridesmaids? I did this once, and I don't know, it just isn't for me. I only want my three little ladies beside me. I am not really sure who Steven wants on his side. He doesn't really have any "friends" he hangs out with. He is kind of a loner in that aspect. Except for me, but I will already be beside him, holding his hand.

I am also resisting the urge to chop all my hair off. I envision long curly tendrils, bouncing my neckline and either a fancy mini top hat of sorts or some feathery little fascinator pinning the curls up behind my right ear.

Fancy lace fingerless gloves is a must. And they have to go to my elbow. Still not sure about the cake, but it will be a spectacular creation. Bottles of poison on the tables and black flowers. Lace and clocks everywhere.

I hate it when my mind get fixated on something creative like this. I feel like I am always about to explode. Its always on my mind, which is going a bajillion miles a minute. Complete thoughts become a jumbled fragmented mess. I have a hard time expressing them verbally. I wish I could draw. I have the same problem with dreams. I can see them in my mind and remember, but to try and verbally reconstitute details is impossible. Freaky. I don't understand me sometimes.

I am thinking a mid-late September evening wedding..and I think it is gonna be epic.